Title:
The Biggest Mistake.
Author: Kristina Q.
Disclaimer: None of these characters belong to me, but if they did, I
sure as hell wouldn't complain *giggles*
Warning: This fic contains male/male graphic sex. A little violence and
some profanity.
Distribution: Anywhere you want as long as you ask me.
Couple: Jesse James/Billy Gunn & Jesse James/Hunter Hearst Helmsley.
Rating: NC-17.
This feeling. So strange. Jesse was unable to identify the feeling, though he
tried very hard.
"Jesse? Jesse, are you listening to what I say?" Hunter's voice
cracked the silence with his question, "Huh...? Oh, sorry. Could you repeat
it?"
Jesse was still trying to understand his feelings inside of him, tickling inside
his stomach; making him a little dizzy.
Not even listening to what Hunter was saying, he slowly gazed up, his eyes
widened and jaw dropped a bit. Fuck, it couldn't be that! It's not possible...
"So, do you wanna go get a drink later tonight or what?" Hunter asked
hoping for Jesse to accept the idea, "Sure, why not..." he watched as
Hunter's eyes was filled with joy and Jesse could have sworn that he saw a
sparkle in his eye; knowing that turning him down would only make him
suspicious, even if he just wanted to stay as far away from Hunter as possible.
He wanted to deny these feelings. He was not allowed to feel this way towards
him. He was with Billy for Christ sake! He wanted to stay with Billy for more
than just a couple of months this time.
In the meantime, Hunter had left the locker room, leaving Jesse all alone, still
trying to understand the emotions running through his mind. It wasn't love. It
wasn't as with Billy. It was something different. Something indescribable and
unbelievable, it was pure. lust? Desire? Wanting to touch what he was not
supposed to touch, taste the illegal flavor of this forbidden area.
Licking his lips at the thought of touching Hunters irresistible, tanned body.
No! He could never do it, no matter what happened! He couldn't betray Billy, the
love of his life, the person he cared so much for. Billy would never do that to
him. Would he? How could he ever doubt Billy's feelings? After all, it always
ended up being Jesse who was the one to hurt Billy, always Billy who was
betrayed and left behind, crying. Jesse didn't want to do that to him once more,
not again, not ever!
Still remembering the day he left Billy all alone, for someone else, who later
turned out to have been using him. Felt heartbroken by the betrayal of him, but
even more heartbroken when he was facing Billy again, watching his tears run
down his cheeks and he promised to himself that if Billy would ever forgive him
then he would stay faithful to him for the rest of their lives! He was now
insecure if he would be able to keep that promise to him and to Billy, who he
loved more than life itself!
***
Jesse was already waiting, for Hunter, at the bar, swallowing his third shot,
very nervous to face Hunter again after realizing his desire for him. What if
his feelings were too obvious? How would he explain it to him, and what if he
felt the same way? Would he be able to control his lust or would he give in to
Hunters burning lips?
Nearly choking on his fourth shot, when someone gently touched his shoulder, he
turned around and saw Hunter standing above him, looking at him with anxious
eyes, and biting his lower lip as Jesse tried not to cough to loud.
"Did I scare you? Sorry." he said very carefully and slowly sat down
next to him, waving to the bartender who immediately came with two beers and two
shot for them. Jesse was already a little drunk and he was sure he would pass
out long before Hunter would even be drunk, but it seemed that he was wrong
about that. Not long after finishing his first beer, Hunter had already started
at the third and was currently working on his second shot. Jesse wasn't sure if
he was just drinking very slowly or if it was Hunter drinking incredibly fast.
One thing was sure: he was just as drunk as Jesse was by now!
"I think I'm about to throw up or else I'm gonna pass out." Jesse
suddenly said, shaking his head to keep himself awake, "No, you're not.
You're just. drunk" Hunter said and smiled, almost making Jesse melt as he
felt his warm hand upon his, caressing his white knuckles, barely able to keep
himself from moaning out loud when his fingers drifted up his tattooed arm,
creating shivers down Jesses spine. Noticing Hunters smile as he gasped for air
due to the soft touch to his sensitive pale skin, he looked into Hunters
sparkling eyes and pulled his hand to himself in an attempt to control his
actions. He would not do this.
***
Jesse slowly opened his sleepy eyes and stared up at the white ceiling. Rubbing
his eyes roughly to keep himself from falling asleep again, he realized he was
lying underneath the blankets in a king-sized bed. "Where am
"Oh, my fucking God! Oh, no. Fuck. Shit, not this!" he nearly tripped
over his own feet as he literally jumped away from the bed, only able to sit
down on the floor to cover his head in his hands to avoid becoming dizzy from
the sudden rising from the bed. Peeking out from his hideout behind his hands,
he was now gazing at Hunters body sleeping peacefully buried underneath the
blankets, his chest moving up and down at a slow pace.
Trying to concentrate on remembering what had been happening last night, he saw
Hunter starting to move a little and he opened his sleep-hazed eyes and was
staring at Jesses pale body sitting frightened on the carpeted floor only
wearing his boxers, holding his knees tightly to his chest, breathing heavy!
"Oh no. I knew this would happen" he said and sat up in the bed still
looking at Jesse, whose expression on his face suddenly changed to a wondering
one, "Do you remember it?" he asked very low and insecure, knowing
that he actually didn't want to hear the answer, as he saw Hunter shake his head
while a frown appeared on his face, Jesse rose from the floor and went into the
bathroom, leaving Hunter for himself.
He smacked the door behind him, placing his hands on each side of the sink and
looked at himself into the mirror in despair. "What have I done? Oh my God,
what have I done?" he said while opening the faucet and splashed the cool
water onto his head, rubbing his hands hard against his cheeks, while the cold
water caused him to get goose bumps on his arms as the water ran down his
wrists, creating wet paths on it's way down.
Jesse was unable to move, still staring into the mirror, while the small water
droplets dripped down fromhis chin and ran down his throat. He was suddenly
shivering as he felt strong arms wrapped around hisbare waist, and fingers
carefully caressing his lower abdomen. Jesse jerked away from Hunters tight
holdand was nearly tripping against the side of the bathtub as his knee smacked
against the cold metal.
"Fuck." he groaned as he rubbed his knee gently, and Hunter handed him
a towel with a caring expression and a smile seemed to appear on his pink lips.
"I'm sorry. for what happened." Jesse heard from Hunter as he reached
out and grabbed the towel and rubbed it gently against his wet skin on his face.
"It can never happen again" he managed to say through the towel and
then he looked into the bright eyes of Hunter and he could tell at once that
Hunter was agreeing with what he had just said. He nodded and dropped the towel
on the white tiled floor and went to find his clothes, placed in one corner of
the room not far from the king-sized bed and Hunter followed him not long after.
***
Hunter was standing in the locker room, getting ready and getting dressed, he
heard the door open very slow at the other end of the room, and he turned to see
Jesse entering through the door. He was indeed surprised to see him in his
locker room, thinking of what happened between them the day before and he
narrowed his eyes, sending Jesse a wondering look.
Jesse could see on Hunters expression that he had to explain the reason why he
was there right now. "Hi, I just wanna. say that. what happened yesterday
was just an accident. That's all" he said while he was playing with one of
his braids as a pure sign of him being nervous, "I know. We were pretty
pissed, and it has been happening to me once before" Hunter smiled as he
noticed Jesse's 'huh' expression, "That was how it all started with me and
Shawn. We were both drunk too, but at least I could remember it" a small
sigh came from Jesse as he asked if he still couldn't remember anything. Shaking
his head as his hand nearing Jesse's jaw, and that familiar sparkle once again
appeared in his eyes.
He wanted to jerk away as he felt Hunter's fingers touching his jaw gently,
slowly moving his fingers down his throat and down his clothed chest, and
caressing one of his hardened nipples. An involuntary moan escaped from his dry
lips and he licked them to avoid them to crack, as he ran his own fingers
through Hunter's long blond hair and ended up holding his hand around his neck
then Jesse could no longer keep himself from Hunter's tempting lips and he
claimed them passionately, rubbing their tongues against each others.
Suddenly able to feel Hunter's erection against his inner thigh, Jesse was now
unable to control his own actions and he literally ripped of his shirt as well
as Hunter's shirt and licked his way down his throat, further down to his
tanned, muscular chest, tracing his tongue around his nipple, causing a moan
from Hunter as Jesse's tongue moved down to his navel, but then he pulled away.
Smiling as he could see the disappointment in Hunter's eyes, he looked at a
table standing aside not far from them. Hunter looked at it too and at once
understood what he meant, while his disappointed lips seemed to develop into a
lustful grin. Hunter gazed at Jesse with desire as he moved towards the table
and sat on top of it, his eyes telling Hunter to move forward to him.
Once again their lips met, Jesse wrapping his arms around Hunter's naked back as
he was holding him by the hips, now able to feel Jesse erection against his own.
Hunter was now working on the fly of Jesse's pants, while he was kissing his
throat and sucking hard enough to leave red marks on his path. Jesse rose for a
brief moment and he could feel his pants fall down around his ankles, soon
followed by his boxers and then he laid himself on the table, with Hunter
hovering above him.
Licking his lips anxious as he watched Hunter unzip his own pants and then
leaving himself completely exposed, and leaned against Jesse and started kissing
him on his chest, starting to suck gently on one of his nipples, leaving a red
mark around it. Jesse couldn't help but groan due to the incredible pleasure
shooting through his tensed body, as Hunter suddenly licked the tip of his cock.
"I want you." Jesse managed to pant despite his heavy breathing, and
Hunter smiled at what he had just heard coming from Jesse's mouth.
Gasping for air as Jesse suddenly felt one of Hunter's fingers pushing inside of
him, afraid to move his finger as he noticed Jesse's sharp inhale, "Am I
hurting you? Do you want me to stop?" Hunter questioned a little frightened
of hurting him. "No, no. Just give me a minute." he managed to
breathe. When Jesse's body finally started to relax, Hunter pushed in another
finger and slowly stretching him in preparation, for what was about to happen
next.
When Hunter's finger brushed against Jesse's prostate, and Jesse trembled from
the pleasure mixed with the pain, he knew it was time. He slowly removed his
fingers and placed himself between Jesse's legs and slowly pushed himself
inside, while Jesse was still trembling due to the astonishing pleasure
streaming through every vein in his tensed body.
Thrusting into Jesse at a slow and controlled pace, to keep him from coming too
early, listening to Jesse's soft moans as their hips met in one hard thrust,
making Jesse moan his name out loud.
Increasing his thrusts harder and faster caused Jesse to close his eyes, barely
able to breathe as he felt Hunter's cock reach his prostate and Jesse
desperately gasped for air when he felt a warm hard around his own erection,
stroking him gently.
Closing his eyes to the overwhelming pleasure as he felt Hunter's seed filled
him inside and he was now unable to hold back his orgasm, and he was trembling
uncontrollable when he finally released his own cum into Hunter's warm hands.
For a minute the entire world had seemed lost, but everything suddenly returned
to Hunter's mind as he saw Jesse point towards the door, "Shawn." he
breathed with eyes wide open, and Hunter turned around looking at Shawn,
standing in the door with an evil grin on his face.
Jesse's eyes seemed to widen even more and he tried to pull himself up,
"Fuck.!" he moaned as he saw Billy entering the room behind Shawn.
Jesse was desperately hoping that he would wake up from this nightmare, but it
was no nightmare. Billy was staring at the two naked bodies, one of them, his
lover, Jesse. Looking around in despair and confusion, Billy tried to speak, but
didn't know what to say, so he just left the room, with tears running down his
pink cheeks.
Hunter finally pulled away from Jesse and covered himself up, and Jesse got
himself dressed as fast as he possibly could and ran after Billy, calling out
his name. When he reached him he was standing in the hallway, wiping away his
tears, but he jerked away from Jesse hand touching his shoulder, "Don't
touch
"I love you." Jesse managed to pant, still lying on the floor, the
blood running down his throat, "It doesn't seem that way!" Billy
yelled and grabbed the collar of Jesse and pulled him to his feet and then
slammed him as hard as he could into the wall, and the back of Jesse's head was
knocked hard against the wall, and Jesse's eyes slowly closed as everything
became dizzy and spun around and then Billy let go of him and Jesse sank to the
floor, gazing after Billy as he disappeared down the hallway.
***
Shawn and Hunter was arguing about the incident with Jesse, because Shawn
thought it was amusing, but Hunter didn't think that at all and just as he was
about to punch Shawn, Jesse fell in the door and fell unconscious to the floor,
his face covered in blood and blood also dripping from a big gash in the back of
his head, causing a puddle of blood underneath his head, staining his braids.
***
Jesse slowly regains consciousness, but does not open his eyes, because of the
argument between Shawn and Hunter. He can hear them talk about the incident in
the locker room earlier that day. Hunter is obviously upset, but Shawn sound
like he's entertained by the position he found him and Hunter inside the locker
room, then Jesse opened his eyes, his head was pounding and he looked at Shawn
and then at Hunter, "Where am I.?" he barely managed to say, feeling
his head ache even more as he opened his mouth.
"You're at the hospital" Shawn grinned, apparently still finding it
funny, and Hunter stared at him with a annoyed expression on his face, and then
continued, "Your nose is broken, and. erm, you have a big gash in the back
of your head and a mild concussion," Jesse smiled sarcastically,
"Well, that certainly explains why my head feels like someone put a gun to
my temple and pulled the trigger"
Hunter took Jesse hand is his and caressed his cold knuckles with his thumb and
looked at Shawn, "Can you leave us for a moment?" "Erm. I think
I'm gonna try call Billy." he grinned and then left the room, leaving Jesse
and Hunter to themselves.
"I'm sorry." Hunter said very guilty, somehow convinced that it was
all his fault, Jesse tilted his head back, and then inhaled sharp as his wound
connected with the pillow, "Oh, fuck. It's not your fault. I was a part of
it too. You can't blame yourself for something I also did. Do you understand
me?" he said looking into Hunter's bright eyes, seeing a tear escaping from
his eye. At the same moment Shawn comes back into the room, shaking his head as
a sigh escapes his lips. He couldn't find him. "But. I didn't have anything
to lose. You have Billy." he then said with sad eyes, and then suddenly
felt a teasing slap to his neck from Shawn.
Hunter looked at Jesse and in his eyes he could see that it was time to tell
Shawn about their bar visit, and then he told it all to Shawn, from the arrival
at the bar to the awaking in the morning. Shawn didn't even get to react to any
of it before Jesse interrupted his thinking.
"Is my concussion really bad or is Kane standing in the door?" it
suddenly came from Jesse as he gazes surprised at the door, both Shawn and
Hunter turned around and was just as surprised as Jesse to see the big man
standing in the door.
"What the hell are you doing here?" it came from Hunter trying to
figure out what was going on. "I heard you were on the hospital, so I just
wanted to check if you were ok. Make sure it wasn't because of Thursday night,
when I found you at that bar" Kane said completely unaware of what had
happened since that night, "What!" Hunter almost yelled it out,
"You were both so drunk, you almost couldn't walk and I thought I would
return you to your rooms upstairs, but I was only able to find Hunter's key, so
I just put you both in his room. I undressed you both and put you in the bed,
and you passed out moments later. Well I have to go now, I'm in a rush" he
said and left smacking the door behind him leaving all three men completely
stunned.
"Oh, my God. but I thought. we thought. oh no" Hunter hardly managed
to say, rubbing his hands in his eyes. Shawn seemed to be laughing even more
than he was before, so he just choked his own laughter with his hand and went
out to try call Billy again.
None of the two men seemed to neither move nor breathe in the next few minutes,
only staring at each other in despair. Hunter was now tightening his grip around
Jesse's hand, nearly jumping in surprise as Shawn opened the door and told them
he had located Billy. He was at Sean's place.
***
Billy was crying unable to stop thinking of Jesse, still seeing the image of
Hunter inside of his precious Jesse. How many times had it been happening? He
had lost his Jesse again, this time for good, to Hunter. But he didn't want to
lose him, he wanted to hold him and tell him how much he loved him and kiss his
delicious lips. Play with his braids. Smell the scent of his Jesse. Feeling his
fingers caress his body. Billy cried even more now. He was already longing for
Jesse. He couldn't just leave him; he had to know if he still loved him.
Sean couldn't bear to see Billy this way and he hugged him trying to convince
him that Jesse still loved him, "You have to talk to him," he said
chuckling and tried not to start crying.
Billy knew he had to talk to him, but he just didn't know what to say. He wanted
to believe what Sean was telling him. Wiping his tears away, he chuckled and
sighed, "I'm gonna go talk to him. I love him so much!" he said while
Sean nodded understanding.
***
Hunter was no longer able to stay awake for much longer, so he had given in to
Shawn and taken with him home, to get some sleep.
Jesse was now sleeping peacefully, dreaming about his beloved Billy. Dreaming of
Billy holding his cold hand, caressing it tenderly.
Shivers running down his spine as he heard a gentle 'I love you' whisper in his
ear, feeling a warm breath against his skin.
He opened his sleep-hazed eyes and looked at the worried face of Billy, little
droplets of tears dripping onto Jesse's hand. Jesse raised his hand and wiped
the tears away from his cheekbone with his thumb, causing Billy to tremble at
his loving touch. He grabbed Jesse's hand and kissed the cold tips of his
fingers, and then he bent down and embraced Jesse, holding him tight as if he
would never let go of him again. "I love you so much. I'm sorry. can you
ever forgive me?" Jesse whispered as he ran his hands down Billy's spine
and sighed.
"We have to work this out. I love you too and I can't live without you.
God, I love you so much!" Billy said and tightened his grip around Jesse's
body as both men started crying.
"I'm sorry for assaulting you." Billy suddenly said and looked down,
Jesse smiled and kissed his dry lips, making them wet with his tongue, "It
hurt like hell" Jesse giggled as he pulled his lips from Billy's, and once
again they hold each other tightly.
