Title: Questions.

Author: Kristina Q.

Disclaimer: None of these characters belong to me *sigh* but if they did I sure as hell wouldn’t complain! *giggles*

Distribution: Anywhere as long as you ask me.

Warning: Profanity, slash.

Rating: PG-13.

Spoiler: SummerSlam 1998.

Notes: Jesse James POV.

I don’t know what it is that makes me feel this way towards him. I never knew I felt like this. I mean I’ve always known I wasn’t straight, but I never even considered the possibility of falling in love with my tag team partner.

He is always so nice to me. He treats me with respect. We always have a great time together. He can always make me laugh. Sometimes he laughs at something that’s not even funny, but just listening to his heart-warming laughter just makes me smile!

Maybe that is one of the many reasons that caused me to fall in love with him in the first place. Billy Gunn, the most gorgeous human being on this planet. Watching him when he walks and in the ring. God, he’s just irresistible!

Fuck, I’m scared of being around him now! What if I get a fucking hard on? What if he finds out about my feelings for him? What if he leaves me? What if he feels the same way as I do? Fuck, I don’t know what to do now.

Should I tell him how I feel? Let him know my deepest secret? My weakness. Hope and pray for him not to leave me.

How will he react? Will he start laughing? Thinking that I’m joking? Thinking that it’s just another one of my pranks? Something the kid and me would have planned to make him look like a fool? After all it wouldn’t be the first time we’d done that!

Would he be shocked if I told him? Be disgusted and push me away, leaving me begging for him not to go? Fuck, that’ll be worst thing that could happen. I’d rather want to stay as his tag team partner than having him reject me completely because of my feelings for him.

What if he accepts the way I feel, but tells me that we can never be a couple. That’s probably how he will react. And believe me that’s fine with me. I mean, of course I’d rather want him to be in love with me, but if he’s not then that’s just the way it is. Life goes on.

I just wish I knew how he felt! Some may say ignorance is bliss, but for me it’s fucking torture! Being around him almost every day. Talking to him. Even showering with him! That’s the worst part of us being a team! I’m always making up stupid excuses to avoid showering with him. I wouldn’t want to get hard while I was naked and in the same room as him!

Maybe it would just be the best if I just tried to forget him. Ignore my feelings for him. Though I think it would be impossible. I can’t deny my feelings… my love for him. He will probably know eventually anyway.

What about the kid? A few weeks ago he made it pretty clear to me that he feels the same way about me as I do with Billy. I admire Sean’s courage. He had kept it a secret for months and finally got the nerve to tell me.

Poor Sean. I had to tell him that we could never be more than just friends. He is my friend. My best friend and I love him like he was my little brother, but that’s it. There’s nothing more to say about that…

“Are you soon ready for our match?”

Billy’s calling now. It’s soon time for our match. We have to fight for the titles tonight.

“Yeah, a few minutes and I’m ready.”

It’s a big day today. I hope we’re gonna win the titles again. I think we deserve it. We’ve worked our asses off for this and I won’t let this opportunity go away. I’m gonna do my best. For myself. For the titles. And for Billy. I believe Billy will be doing his best too. I trust him and hopefully he also trusts me.

My heart is beating faster now than usual. I guess it’s because of the match. And because of Billy. I love him so much. I don’t think I can live without him. I have to tell him.

It scares me. I don’t want to lose him. I want to embrace him; feel his warm body close to mine. Inhale his indescribable scent. I wanna feel him. I wanna touch his delicate skin. I wanna taste his exquisite flavor. I wanna love him day and night.

Why can’t I just suck it up and go tell him? I’m a fucking pussy!

“Jesse? Are you ready?”

That beautiful voice of his. Enough to cause me to melt.

Maybe I should just let destiny decide whether or not I’m going to tell him. If we win the match tonight then I will tell him!

“I’m ready now…”

Now I just hope that everything will work out for the better.